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My life is full of imagination, especially when i'm alone.
I'll imagine lots of stuffs, realistic and unrealistic.
Sometimes even a normal conversation with my friends.
And that troubles me a lot, because of that 'habit', it makes my mind flies, especially in a boring class or when i'm studying.
Even when i'm driving or walking, i live in my own wonderland.
Thats why people complains that i wont notice them even they were just in front of me , for a few times.
Of course i'm tired of those imaginations which will just be imaginations, but i just cant get it out of my head.
I did some little research to find the reason of this phenomena:
Some says that its the nature of a girl.
Some says that Cancerian live in a life full of imagination.
So, maybe that explains it.
Then, i recently i started to imagine myself, got crazy because of all the imaginations.
Then i will really be crazy, having hallucinations and end up talking to myself or etc.
Hope that i can quit it by making myself busier.
Its so tiring. I wish my mind can go blank sometimes.
Am i normal?
I'm trying hard to get my life more organized.
To control my expenses.
To follow my schedule.
To work more.
To snooze less.
To give more heart in whatever i'm doing aka serious.
To become pretty. \(^o^)/
I just need some more time, to achieve the optimum level.
So please, give me some time and a chance to achieve it. Thank you.
I went to take a nap, at around 11 something.
Then when my alarm rang at around 12:30pm,( cause i got a tutorial at 1pm)
as usual i pressed d snooze button, kinda tired slept less than 5 hours last night.
Then my eye lids felt heavy, and i just let it down.
Out of sudden my body got numb, and the numbness was increasing gradually, mostly focus on the part which touches the bed (i usually sleep facing downwards),
Then my heart was beating very fast, i wanted to get up but i cant, i tried very hard to move my hands and fight to get myself up.
I managed to open my eyes, was scared of what happened, but still very very tired so i closed my eyes again and within spilt seconds ( less than 3)
it happened again, this time i can feel that it is more serious.
Then i heard the radio, turned on by itself ( FM sound, not very clear)
And also the sound of the door, my dad came home.
I wanted to yell at him, ask him to help me up, at first i wasnt able to split a word.
After some struggles i managed call him and asked him to lift me up.
Then i regain my consciousness, i realized that it was all just a dream.
Just because the scene is in the same room and i was sleeping in the same position it feels like real.
It happened to me before. But i really feel very bad when i was in the dream.
Is this how ppl die in their dream? I mean if i din struggle hard enough, will i be dead now??
Anyway, i'm late for class. Got to go, see ya.
